How to Outlet Shop with a Toddler in 15 Annoying Steps

You may recall that there’s already an All Things Spliced post with a very similar name to this one. You may also be wondering, therefore, why I put myself through this, time and again. Well aside, from creating great blog material (obviously), shopping’s just one of those things, isn’t it? Just one of those necessities, that needs to be done. And this time, instead of Christmas shopping (even Christmas obsessed Mrs Lighty doesn’t start this early!), it was to buy Baby Lighty his first proper pair of shoes.

So…outlet shopping with a toddler…here goes:

1. Take toddler to have their feet measured at a well-known High Street shoe shop.

2. Balk at the price of two tiny shoes that are likely to last 6 – 8 weeks before he outgrows them, and be secretly quite pleased when the sales assistant informs you that they have nothing in Baby Lighty’s size.

3. Decide to take a trip to the local outlet centre branch the next day.

4. When the next day rolls round, forget that a major festival is taking place at a location between you and the outlet centre until you’re en route, and therefore have to take the longer route that involves lots of roundabouts.

5. Said roundabouts seem to cause Baby Lighty to be travel sick. And what do the parenting laws of sod mean?! Yep, you haven’t packed any spare clothes.

6. Pull into a supermarket en route. Leave Mr Lighty wet wiping Baby Lighty down in the boot of the car while you dash in to see if you can buy the spare set of clothes you should’ve brought with you.

7. Supermarket doesn’t sell clothes. Wipe Baby Lighty down as best you can and set off.

8. Arrive at Outlet Centre, first port of call is to buy those spare clothes, trying to ignore any glances that could be interpreted as judgemental from fellow parents en route.

We did get a cute outfit out of the sickness incident! Top and shorts from Next, shoes from Clarkes. Lavender: blogger’s own!!
9. Once Baby Lighty is changed, go to get the shoes you came for in the first place. Mr Lighty nearly has a heart attack at the sight of the queue outside until he realises that this is for feet measuring, and we’ve already had Baby Lighty’s feet measured (see step 1). On entering the shop, wonder if you’ve gone slightly mad, as it’s crazy-busy with parents trying to buy back-to-school shoes. You do, however, manage to locate Baby Lighty’s size and buy a suitable pair.

10. By this point, Baby Lighty is hungry, so you decide to stop for coffee and a bite to eat. The first coffee shop you enter, however, has a queue almost as long as the queue for the feet measuring at the shoe shop, so you decide to go elsewhere. The only problem with this is that Mr Lighty and Baby Lighty have already made themselves comfortable outside, and Baby Lighty objects to being removed from his snack.

11. After carrying a crying Baby Lighty because, out of protest of being removed from his food, he either a) won’t walk the short distance to the nearest coffee shop or b) sit in the buggy, purchase tea. Have a slight tiff with Mr Lighty as you’re apparently supposed to be psychic and / or not have left your phone with him in the change bag and instinctively know that he would’ve rather’ve had a milkshake than a cuppa. Feel slightly miffed that you’ve treated him to a sausage roll if that’s the way he feels.

12. It starts to rain as you’re enjoying your tea (not milkshake), and you’re sitting outside. Of course you bloody are. Quickly put Baby Lighty in the pushchair. Mr Lighty proudly tells you that he’s worked out how to put the rain cover on the buggy. That’s good, but by the time you’ve done it as a team effort, it’s pretty much stopped raining.

The shoes!!
13. Start shopping properly. Get all excited when you see your favourite pair of Baby Lighty’s shorts, as they were hand-me-downs, and seeing them here at the outlet you realise that they must’ve been last season’s. But this is good news, as perhaps now you can buy them in a size up ready for next summer?! Realise as you walk over, however, that the little ‘Hawaiian’ shorts that you love so much on him are actually girls’ shorts!! Whoops!!

14. Don’t really see anything else that takes your fancy. It’s a bit hit and miss this outlet shopping malarkey, isn’t it?

15. Realise that after all that, the £7.00 you saved by outlet-shopping the shoes has probably been negated by the 45 minutes’ petrol each way, the coffee break and the spare clothes you had to buy…and you therefore force Mr Lighty to buy himself a polo shirt, just to make the trip worthwhile.

And so I’ve just realised exactly why we put ourselves through this. The footnote of Mrs Lighty’s Christmas shopping post, of course, which is: repeat steps 1 – 15.

Oh well, maybe I’ll be able to enjoy shopping again when Baby Lighty is 18, perhaps?! At least the spare clothes gave me an excuse to buy yet another cute outfit for him…

Proud to be linking up with:

The Pramshed
My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows
This Mum's Life
3 Little Buttons
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23 thoughts on “How to Outlet Shop with a Toddler in 15 Annoying Steps

  1. Ha, you have literally described my weekend! I didn’t realise said outlet shopping centre would be so busy, even though you warned me! Love that Baby Lighty and Alfie got their new shoes on the same weekend, they need a play date soon to show them off to each other xx

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    1. Well we were still crazy enough to go even though I had warned you!! Yep proper shoes this time too, not rubber soles cruisers, now that he’s a size 3! 🙈 Play date definitely needed soon xxx

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  2. Well sounds like you had a great day !?! Haven’t been to an outlet in ages, always end up spending money on stuff I don’t want and therefore spending more money than if I had just bought what I wanted in full price shop! #fortheloveofblog

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  3. What an epic joinery. Hilarious to read as big Munch and me stopped at an outlet shopping place on way back from the farm today. I was also looking for her shoes! Painfully there weren’t any that fit. I was good and returned a bomber jacket I don’t really need and arms are a bit short! On the way to the pick big Munch ended up picking a jigsaw puzzle. So much for going to the shops to get her shoes. #fortheloveofBLOG

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    1. Ha! Well everyone needs a jigsaw puzzle over shoes, right?! Unfortunately for us, every single word in this blog is completely true, it was an, erm, interesting day?! Thanks for taking the time to read my post 🙂 #fortheloveofBLOG

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I have no idea. Plus at 15 months he’s only *just* big enough for proper shoes…when he first started walking we were paying £25 just for cruisers!! Luckily we’re not quite at the fleecing stage yet as his vocab isn’t advanced enough just yet!! Thanks for taking the time to read my post 🙂

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  4. Haha this sounds familiar! I try to avoid shopping at all costs these days – online shopping is the way to go! Tricky when feet need measuring though. We bought 1yo some shoes from a well-known high street brand recently, balked at the price, and then lost the shoes the day after! Waited a week before giving in and buying some more. Then found original shoes 2 days after that!!! Aaaargh! Nightmare! #BigPinkLink

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  5. Oh yes, I think you’ve just described every shopping trip I’ve ever made with my children!! In fact, shoe shopping for the forced measuring, is the only time I take them now!! I refuse!! And we no longer go to the supermarket either! The shoes are veeeery cute though, and like you say, you got to choose some cute outfits, and Mr Lighty got something new!! I’ve also joked about enjoying shopping when they’re over 18, but now I reckon when their at school will be a good time to indulge!!
    #bigpinklink

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  6. Oh so very painfully familiar! We live around 5 mins from quite a sizeable “outlet” shopping centre and I love it. Just not with children. Not ever with the children! And yet, like you I seem to find myself arriving at the very same well known shoe store, desperately in need of toddler shoes at the end of August, alongside what can only be described as all of the school children in the world. Gah! xx #bigpinklink

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  7. It’s sounds relaxing 🙂 I’m afraid I wouldn’t let a child get into a day of outlet shopping, it would pain me too much not to be able to shop for myself #MarvMondays

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  8. Oh no! I remember something similar happening with my son. We were having lunch in a restaurant and he vomited his mac and cheese all over himself (he was about 2 at the time). It stank and was just everywhere so we wet wiped him and then realised that we had no spare clothes. It was -10 outside and snowing and we had to strip him down to his vest and run down the road to the nearest Primark to buy him new clothes! Major parenting fail!! Thanks for linking up with us on #fortheloveofBLOG x

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  9. Ugh shopping with kids is the worst. We recently had to find size 22 black leather school shoes for my lad starting nursery. I didn’t realize they made shoes like that so small…and neither did the first 4 shoe shops. 50 euors!!!!

    #Fartglitter

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    1. Yep. We have a similar problem…these were *technically* Baby Lighty’s second pair of shoes as he had a pair of rubber soles cruisers when he first started walking because he was too small for ‘proper’ shoes! Nightmare!! And so expensive!! #fartglitter

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